If you love him and are not just codependent the love you feel for him will involve mutual respect, healthy boundaries and support.
If you're just codependent then it means that you have an unhealthy reliance on him for emotional validation and self worth.
Love and codependency are distinct, but even codependent people can have feelings that resemble love.
Codependency can also manifest as having an excessive need to please, a fear of abandonment and even difficulty in setting boundaries, whereas healthy love fosters individual growth as well as autonomy.
Codependent people may also sometimes have affairs.
Codependency itself does not cause infidelity directly although the dynamics and patterns within codependent relationships can create environments in which affairs can become more likely to occur.
The dynamics also often involve a lack of emotional fulfillment, resentment and also a desire to seek validation outside of the primary relationship.
The impact that codependency can have on relationships include resentment and unmet needs, low self esteem and insecurity, difficulty in saying no and boundary issues, seeking external validation and idealization and fantasy.
Codependents may idealize other people and lead to fantasy crushes or limerence, which can also contribute to affairs.
Codependents also often will rely on external validation for their sense of self worth and if they don't get this validation within their primary relationship, they might seek it somewhere else.
And codependents may struggle to say no and struggle to set boundaries, and it can potentially enable them to engage in behaviors which they may have otherwise avoided, including affairs.
Codependency is also often linked to low self esteem as well as insecurity, which can also make people more vulnerable to seek attention and validation from other people, which can potentially lead to affairs.
And in relationships that are codependent, one partner will often sacrifices their needs to cater to the other, which can lead to dissatisfaction and resentment.
And this imbalance can also create an environment in which the person may seek external validation and connection.